Rainbow&Stars

Monday, August 07, 2006

hi..it's me back again..hai..my feelings are hard to explain ..guess i think this song really know how i feels ba..

been 2 days ago..i ask myself 3 questions..and try to understand what yan ping is going through right now ..why she does this..how is she at this moment..what is she think...what is her situation nw..

everyday, i put myself in her shoes. she is always in my mind wherever i go...until yesterday..i finally got the answers to the questions and i think i understand those thoughts that are going through right her at this moment..her thoughts..situation..plan..left with uncertainties , loneliness , despair , and the thought of giving up lingers in her....

until yesterday , i found my courage . courage to face a relationship (if any). courage to accept something that i had no experience before. the reason i told yp those things is also because i have not found my courage yet. all these while..i ask myself "i have no experience in relationship before and i also have problems..will she will zhai yi and yuan gen wo zhou zhe duan jian ao de lu ma " ..if she does..will she be happy?..will it be fair to her?.. what can i give to her?..finally i decided to take the first step..if she chose me..i don know what i can do..what i can give ...all i know is that i will accept it ..give her my heart ..give her my everything...

for now..i hope to everyday there supporting yp , be there for her , give her time to slowly find back her courage..courage to find back herself , courage that will help overcome her fears and obstacles in her life ..courage to accept another person and many other things.. i know that during this period of time yp might not like me anymore but as long she can find back herself ..her normal , cheerful and jumpy self..all those hurt and pain are all worth it..(:

the song "Yong Qi" is meant for her. I think this song also explains her thoughts ..her feelings at this moment.. my too..most of the lyrics i also wanted to tell her.."Wo Zhi Dao Zhe Yi Qie Bu Rong Yi.."..i really do know yp..and "Wo Yuan Yi Tian Ya Hai Jiao Dou Gen Sui Ni Qu.."..no matter what happens..i will not leave you yp and be there for you wherever u need me..i fear that u might give up..give up on yourself..give up on everything..but i will never give up on you..nv..i will support you ..support you till the day you can stand up on yourself..

lastly .."Wo Zhong Yu Zhuo Le Zhe Ge Jue Ding.."..my decision is to love you only my whole life..( yi bei zi zhi ai ni yi ge).. you must be still wondering why i like you ba..but really every word i say to you is true. my whole life..really my whole life.. i've been waiting for someone like you. I love you for who you are.Love you for your everything..hmm*

hope everyone that hears this song , violet also..to have courage to do and pursue everything u always wanted..u know what i mean =p..

ok then..didn't sleep for a day already..still going to study for test tomorrow..seeing my mum resting on the sofa..haiz..everything going to be alright..look forward to everyday..look forward to walking the field to school and staring at the clouds.. .haha..off i go then ..remember to stay happy everyone =).."YAO YOU YONG QI WOR! "..hehex..tweese!..

8:16 PM